The hunger.

Firstly the title of this post is another song. This might become a thing ‘cos I’m too lazy/not funny enough to come up with a title that is witty yet relevant to the topic. This being said it is really quite apt. I’ll try my very hardest for more food related songs for future titles. (It’s a song by The Distillers btw. Check them out)

Moving on… last night I went for an open evening at the college where I’m enrolling to start studying Professional Cookery in September. The lady on the welcome desk wasnt the most helpful she started by asking if I had just left school or if was I at college, I left school 9 years ago, I dont know whether it was a compliment (im taking it as one regardless. It makes me feel slightly better about the several greying hairs i have appearing on my head) or that she’s just inept at her job  working with young people that she cant distinguish between a 16 year old and someone who is 25  24 and 11 months. After a long drawn out converstion asking me for details she didn’t really need, alot of map conferring and me reiterating the fact I actually wasnt on jobseekers (“ah in that case it wont be funded…and you’re over 23 so it definitely wont be funded” YES I KNOW JUST TELL ME WHERE I NEED TO BE PLEASE)  I did finally make it to where I wanted to be.

After 10 minutes talking to the people that run the course I knew its for me and exactly what I want to do. They showed me round the kitchen, talked me through what topics/areas that are covered, the qualification I will get ect and what the course entails. I actually cant wait to get started!
I was quite relieved actually at how sure I am that this is exactly what I want to do. Im having to pay for this course myself (because you know I work for a living and I’m old) and after this year  I will progress on to another year which again I’ll have to pay for, which im totally prepared to do. I want this.I want to make this happened and I can do it for myself. But technically I will be a student so if anyone want to buy me a pint I wont say no ha.

I think the next post will actually be food related and not me just rambling on about  nowt.

 

Byyyyeee xxx

Rudie can’t fail

Eee hiya! As this is my first blog post on my brand spanking new piece of the internet, I suppose we should start at the beginning . I’m a nearly 25 year old (yes, nearly. I’m grasping on to anything that means I’m not offically in my mid-20’s.Youth please come back) single mother from Co.Durham. I love polkadots, the whole 50’s pinup style, red lipstick and the occational margaritas. But most of all I have always loved cooking, for as long as I can remember. I still get the same feeling of pride when you produce something that people love to eat, and you see them truely enjoying something you made, as I did when you make your first (almost edible) concoction as a child and its presented to your Mam with the look of see “I did it”                                                                    I love nothing more than sitting with a new cook book and reading it cover to cover making notes and planning meals. I was recently asked when in a book shop “Have you not got enough cookery books like?” I think the pure look of disgust and the “Do you not know me at all” raising of the eyebrows answered the question adequately.

Looking back, the moment I first realised I actually LOVE baking and knew I had a deep rooted passion about it was when I was making a birthday cake for my Dad. And it well… fell apart…this is where most people would say “Ah well its only a cake” and just go to the shop and buy him one, not me I cried. Not like a hysterical uncontrollable sobbing but I was properly upset. Once I calmed down and told myself I was being utterly ridiculous I managed to salavage it and turn it into something presentable (us mams are good like that) with no trace of tears or the mini meltdown I had experienced, and everyone said it was delicious. Of course it was, it was cake with enough cream to make you gain weight by just looking at it and filled with strawberries. It would have tasted nice if it was all mushed up and you were eating it with a spoon off the floor. But thats not the point.

I’ve heard people say when watching programmes such as the Great British Bake Off “How can they get so emotional its only food” and I was to scream at them “YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND” But, I get it. I get the passion and the sitting in front of the oven praying that when you take that cake out it isn’t actually a disaster. I put everything into what I make, I enjoy trying to better and adapt recipes, my own or other peoples. I dont see it as trying or slaving away trying to cook people a meal, it comes so naturally to me. Cooking to me is an outlet it relaxes me and when things do go wrong (re. the crying over a cake) you, like in life, learn to adapt and know what not to do again, what works and what doesnt. (That’s a whole other post in itself)

I dont really know why I’ve started this blog. I created it with thought in the back of my head like “Don’t be so ridiculous you’re not a writer” and I’m not by any streach claiming to be one but I thought just write one post and I’ve already fallen in love with it (and im only 600 words in, which is probably the most I’ve written in one stint since college…maybe even school ha) I guess I just want to document my journey how I’m changing as a cook and as a person, a place where I have everything together. From recipes and books I love, to badly edited photos of my food I’ve posted on Instagram (with a few selfies thrown in for good measure) My opinions on things, reviews of products and ingredients. Experiences of local foods and businesses and how I feel about what im doing.

While I’m here I’ll explain the name Polkadotbakery. Its been my lifelong dream to own and run my own baking business. (Like a dream that always starts with…”When we win the Lottery”) A little cafe by the sea with some land for the chickens and bairn to run around in. One (probably slightly tipsey) night talking about how I should just do it and me coming up with every excuse under the sun of why it wasnt feasible and im not really that good at it, my boyfriend said you should call it the polkadot bakery and I loved it. It was so me and just seemed so relevent so thats what I’ll call it if I get there (and no he won’t get the credit, he might get a scone named after him and for that he should be eternally grateful) It is still a long off dream but I thought it would never be achievable. However after long discussions, people pushing me and telling me I am actually capable of doing it. I thought why not? Im going back to college, starting this blog and trying my hardest for me and my daughter and our future. If I dont do it now I probably never will. Im not saying I will get my dream of being by the seaside with my own quirky 50’s themed cafe but something half as good will probably be good enough for me.

I think I have probably blabbed on enough for now so…thanks for reading!

P.s. The title of this post is my favourite song ever by The Clash. So if you haven’t heard it go listen to it now. Its dead good :)

P.p.s. I am the most un-technological (no I dont think thats a word either) person ever so please bear with me. Byyyeee xxx